ListCaboodle - Fun, Informative, And Cool Stories In List Format. Youll find the best horse jokes, including colt jokes, mare jokes, foal jokes, race horse jokes and more. Thats because there arent any jokes about nightmares here. Horse jokes for kids and adults? Tagged as: Want more animal jokes? Stable tennis. Why are elephants wrinkled. What do you call a horse thats been all around the world?A globe-trotter. If she doesnt wake up on time, she smells foal because she couldnt shower. We've got the silliest Horse Jokes in town! Score: 5. 19.) How do bees brush their hair. Phew! the cowboy sighs. A talking horse!What do you call it when a racehorse has diarrhea?The trots!Do you know why horse stalls at the racetrack are labelled A, B, D, E, and F?Because no one wants to bet on a seahorse.My wife and kids are leaving me because they say Im obsessed with Horse Racing.Im looking out the window at them now.. and theyre off..I bought a racehorse todayI called him My Face. Teach these . 27 Best Psychology Jokes Guaranteed to Make You Laugh, 41 Hilarious Dirty Jokes to Laugh Your Heart Out (NSFW), 37 Anti Jokes That You Shouldnt Be Laughing At, 27 Funniest Stupid Jokes You Just Have to Tell Your Friends. What did the teacher say when the horse walked into her class?Why the long face?. Knock knock knock knock. Here are 75 funny moose jokes and the best moose puns to crack you up. Horses can sleep both lying down and standing up. He graduated from the University of Nebraska-Omaha with a degree in Secondary Education, and he has his MS in Educational Leadership from Northwest Missouri State University. We hope so that reading this article of horse jokes was fun for you. Where do horses go when they hurt themselves? Its a cult classic! Q: Why did the horse cross the road? Check out these 15 witty bar jokes anyone can remember. Find out the funny answer in today's jokes! But theres no such thing as a whinny- borhood or snort-borhood. 25.) Related:How to Be Funny The Definitive Guide. The stubborn teacher snorted and said, It would be-hoof you to pay attention.. Your email address will not be published. The barman asks: Why the long face?How do you spell Hungry Horse in four letters?MTGG.Lets drink Mint Juleps and horse around.A horse walks into a bar. 242 Funny Animal Jokes That Will Drive You Wild With Laughter. Q: Which football team do horses always cheer for? A horse walks into a bar. What happens when a horse forgets its umbrella?It gets wet. Britney Spurs Horses like Britney Spurs, but they don't like her song, "Hit Me Baby One More Time" for some reason. CTRL + SPACE for auto-complete. A: Aluminum foal. A: Cowboys vs. Broncos. A: I cant hear you whinnie! Q: How did the cowboy know which horse was everyones favorite? 1.) A. Girls who have horses have zero time for much life outside of taking care of the horse. What is a horse's favourite sport? So what have you done with your life? he asks the horse. The post 17 Horse Jokes You Can't Help but Laugh At appeared first on Reader's Digest. Animal Joke Where do horses live. What is a horses favorite television show? multiple-meaning words, The teacher yelled at the horse for foaling around. homonyms, Do you love all things punny? 5. Thanks for reading these funny horse jokes for kids. Q: What team of horses travel all around the world? Q: What do you call a witch horse? Where do horses live for kids? Did you see the mare at the stable dance? The next day he rode back on Friday. There are lots of jokes available online, but if youre looking for a collection of the best ones, youve come to the right place. What did the horse say after she fell over? You may even find that some of them will have you laughing out loud. Youll enjoy these top-notch horse jokes if youre an equestrian! If you dont believe it, you wont until youve run them pasture eyeballs. Race it, replies the jockey, surprised. A: With a yay or neigh. A talking horse walks into a bar and approaches the manager. What did the waiter say to the horse?I cant take your order. First things first: We love horses. What does it mean when you find a horseshoe on the ground? You don't have to be an equestrian to get a good chuckle from these jokes. How do you make a small fortune on horse racing?Start with a large fortune.What kind of food do race horses like to eat?Fast food.Whats similar between a racehorse and a leaky faucet?Theyre both off and running.Theres only one time vampires like watching a horse race.When its neck and neck.A racehorse once smoked some weed just before the race was about to start.Once it started, the jockey couldnt control it as it veered off track. Every time her friend started looking, shed run right pasture! A: The psycho-path. Q: Which type of race horses are the deepest thinkers? Runner Dark Raven fell during the Turners Mersey Novices' Hurdle, just a few hours before the Grand National itself. All Rights Reserved. The best horse jokes will have an unexpected twist or reveal at the end of a bit longer joke typically set up in the beginning. Why is Dick Whittington a horses favourite panto?Because he was mare of London.Why did the horses always miss the support acts at gigs?They are only interested in the mane attraction.Is Nelson Mandela popular amongst horses?Not as much as his wife, Winnie.Why do horses queue up so badly?Theyre always jockeying for position.Did you hear the joke about the horse that was hobbled?Its a bit lame.Which seats do horses book at the theatre?Anywhere in the stalls.How do hip young horses casually greet each other?Hay.What boxing technique does a horse prefer?The pommel.Did you hear about the horse that doubted everything?He was a neighsayer.What did the Italian horse say when he heard there was a speed between trot and gallop?I canter believe it!What do horses see right before it thunders?Lightning colts!A horse walks into a bar.Hey, says the bartender.The horse neighs excitedly and says, My friend, you read my mind!Youre being chased by a Lion, youre on a horse to the left of you is a Giraffe and on the right a unicorn what do you do?You stop drinking and get off the Carousel.Why did the horse run away in the middle of its wedding?It got colt feet! A horse walks into a bar. Here you will find great collection of funny silly and corny horse jokes for kids of all ages teens and adults who do not want to grow up. When he steps outside again, he finds his horse has been stolen. Horses require tons of care. Horses have around 205 bones in their skeleton. Share. A: In Maine. Why are you sleeping? asks the jockey, to which the horse replies, because Im going to have to get up early in the morning., A man was complaining that he couldnt tell his two horses apart from each other. If so, we invite you to share them with your friends on social media or in person! The relentless poop-producers, the . 7.) Three weeks later, a horse walked up to him carrying the Bible in its mouth. Read More 45 Funny Minecraft JokesContinue. Q: Why was Dick Clark so popular with horses? One goes quick and the other goes quack. Prepare to laugh out loud like its a competition when you hear these best horse jokes. Q: What's the quickest way to mail a little horse? Q: What do every horse and rider do together? 100 years ago everyone owned a horse and only the rich had cars. What do young horses wrap their food in?Aluminum foal. What disease was the horse scared of getting?Hay fever. Get off your high horse! A: It was a mudder. Q. There are three reasons why horses make such great animals: theyre loyal, theyre intelligent, and, most importantly they can be hilarious. A: Hay Fever. A: Red Hoof Inn. of their day. What do you say when your horse proposes to your other horse. Wild horses Conservation status Additional resources Horses are hoofed mammals that have lived with humans for thousands of years. What do you call a horse that has a ton of money in the bank? Knock Knock. Just click the to create your snippet! Q: What did the waiter say to the horse? This is the best collection of Clean Horse Jokes that youll find anywhere. A talking dog!, Sam said to Fred, I put 20 on a horse last week, and he came in at twenty-five to one., Not really, said George. Which planet loves to sing. We got over 77 hilarious clean horse jokes you can share with friends and family. 63.) What do you call a horse that likes to stay up late? He stops and says, I dont mean to brag, but Ive won 68 of my last 70 races.The horses all look at each other.Holy shit, says the first one, a talking dog!One-One was a racehorse.One-two was one too. All his jokes were about bad mare-ages. A horse is walking around bare foot. The second dog replies with Thats nothing, Ive won fourteen of my last twenty races. Horses can sleep standing up or lying down. When do vampires like horse racing? A: Horse doeuvres. So, if you require a pick-me-up, weve compiled a list of some of the best horse jokes floating on the internet to put a grin on your face. The jokes within this collection are fun, light, and kid-friendly. The best horse jokes always include a pun. (Yes, we can make as many stable jokes as you wish!). A: The Diamondbacks. The vet said, Yes, of course and I think you will probably win. Which side of the horse has the most hair?The outside. 81.) The cowboy wipes the sweat off his forehead. She impressed all the horses with her whip and neigh neigh. A: The Horsea Shore. Q: Where do newly married horses sleep? A: To get to the bale of hay. This funny collection of friendly and good jokes riddles and puns about horse are clean and safe for children of all ages. 3. A: A buck. Lucky for them all, when he steps outside again his horse has been returned. A: His co-pile-it. Have fun having a laugh! So if your child is in need of a belly laugh or two, read on and prepare to be . The laughs might even keep you 110 The Funniest Horse Jokes That Make You Giddy Up and Giggle Saddle up and get ready for a wild ride. Wow! says one, after a hushed silence. Where do horses go when theyre sick?The horse-pital. A: He was going to stirrup some interest. Q: What do you call a well-balanced horse? Q: What do you name a horse you root for? Youre riding a horse full speed, theres a giraffe right beside you, and a lion behind you. Horsing around - Mischievous little horses like horsing around. Q: What NFL football matchup is always a win-win for horses? Q: What did the race horse order from the bakery? Main Street. Q: What kind of stories do depressed horses tell? We dont horse around when it comes to horse jokes (same with why did the chicken cross the road? jokes). reading comprehension, Q: Which horse is an advocate for horse safety? A horse walks into a bar. Everyone loves horses and its ride. If you want to make your day and lift your mood, look no further. A bunch of ponies were foaling around in a classroom. What kind of bread does a horse eat?Thoroughbred. 35.) Read on and check out the best jokes for kids! This. Q: What's the quickest way to mail a little horse? They might be a little hoarse! A: Ralph Neigh-der. From corny puns to silly quips, your kid will now have a pocket full of horse jokes to pull out and make their friends laugh.. 84.) How do you know a horse has a negative attitude? Did you hear about the pessimist pony?He was a neigh-sayer! He was from the centaur for disease control. In this list, you will find everything from horse puns to jokes to horse memes. Ahorsewas arrested and brought to the police station for questioning. Q: How are clouds like horse jockeys? Q: Why did the horse go to the doctor? What did the horse say when it fell?Ive fallen and I cant giddyup!. Why dont you look into a horses mouth? A: Its pasture your bedtime. I put a bet on a horse to. However, dont worry, since we have tons of other lists of jokes you can keep reading: We hope youve enjoyed this article and that the horse jokes brought a smile to your face. Why did the foal get in trouble at school? These jokes about horses are great horse jokes for kids and adults. The bartender, full of shock, says, Holy pony! The stubborn teacher snorted and said, "It would be-hoof you to pay attention." How do you save a horse possessed by an evil spirit?Perform an ex-horse-ism. A horse was euthanised following a fall in the third race on the final day of the Aintree Festival. Its a real tale of whoa. Unfortunately all the others came in at 1230. A Kanye West documentary is heading to Netflix and Cardi B is. You'll find the best horse jokes, including colt jokes, mare jokes, foal jokes, race horse jokes and more. Q: How do you know when a horse has a negative attitude? Watch John Mulaney: Kid Gorgeous at Radio City, only on Netflix. An animal with a 50-million-year long evolutionary process Over the course of 50 million years, horses evolved from small, many-toed animals to the majestic, single-toed equines we know today. Knock knock. Know a child who loves horses? Son: Can I have a pony for Christmas?Mom: The ovens only big enough for a turkey! Tell them to stop being so a-hoof. Don't order hay for your horse off Amazon. 4.) A. Two racehorses are in a stable. A: I can't take your order. Q: How do you hire a horse? One says to the other, You know, before that last race . How? He has a beautiful wife and a Mini Australian Shepherd that own most of his time and heart. What do you call a horse wearing Venetian blinds?A zebra. Almost all wild horses are feral horses that are descended . Financially stable! Are you looking for horse jokes for kids with puns? Check in every week for a terrible teaser! Diagnostic Imaging Systems, Inc. (DIS) has been providing Quality Imaging products since 1983. These are appropriate for any age, so you dont need to be wary of sharing them with a broad audience. How do winged horses walk if they become pirates. We should name him Neigh-palm! What makes a horse sneeze? If you or your child love horses, then youll enjoy these horse jokes for kids. These silly horse jokes for kids are great to share. How do you make a small fortune on horse racing? A cowboy walks into an expensive car showroom and says, "Audi!". Even if you are one of the few people on the planet who can call themselves a true animal jokes enthusiast, keep reading to see if your favorite joke made it onto the list! For all my life I have been tamed and ridden horses. A: Horse radishes. Q: What looks like half a horse? I heard it from my brother The other boy was curious so he agreed and said yes. Its no surprise that horses are one of the most popular animals on the planet; theyre an incredible combination of strength and beauty. What kind of shoes do frogs love. 82.) Q: What do horses see before thunder? (You should have seen that one coming.). Q. The therapist asked, Why such a long face? The horse replied, I hate my job! Why dont you quit? the therapist asks. Some of the puns were too foal! A: When it's neck and neck. Where do horses live. Riddle: A pig lives in a pig farm, a cow lives in a cow farm, a sheep lives in a sheep farm, a chiken lives in a chiken farm. It's little wonder that horses remain one of the most popular animals in the world they're just such an amazing mix of power and beauty. Q: Where do horses stay at night when they travel? Horse racing is a centuries-old practicein most countries, with its own distinct world. Thats not my assigned stable. Find out the funny answer in today's jokes! If so, please leave a comment below! He rides all day and starts to nod off in the saddle when he notices he is about to ride straight over a cliff. What do you say to people that ride tall mares? Do you know what happened to the man that tried to wash the horses mane? This section holds lots of jokes so kids can expand their sense of humor and creative thinking. A: He was so slow that they had to pay the jockey overtime. Thank God!. Q. Whats the favorite part of a horse race for a vampire? You sound a little horse. 38.) . How is this possible?The horses name was Friday.Horses are so negative.All they do is neigh.Where do horses stay after they get married?The bridle suite.This one horse always has a bad attitude.She keeps saying, Neigh.How do you get a wild horse to accept a halter?You turn the stables on him.Why did the little pony wake up scared?It had a night-mare!Why was the horse naked?Because the jockey fell off.If I ever get a horse, Im naming him Jesus.Then I can say to people I lead him to water, but couldnt make Him walk on it.What song makes a horse want to get up and dance?Watch me whipwatch me neigh, neigh! What are horses favorite food? A: Broncos vs. Colts. See, it's hard to pin down what makes Bargatze funny, but whatever it is, it's all in that six-minute story. Stable tennis. Q: What does a horse say when you don't give them enough hey? These horse jokes are especially great for parents, horse lovers, teachers, cowboys, ranchers and farmers - but they are fun for everyone who enjoys cowboys, rodeo and horses. No cowboy's were harmed in the making of this dad joke.RIP Powers Boothe, such a legend!#dadjoke #dadjokes #dadjokesfordays #dadjokesdaily #dadjokesrule #dad. Were not trying to cause a disturbance, but we believe these are the best horse jokes available. Fortunately, one of the best things we can do is laugh at all of the amusing horse racing jokes that occur along the way. And just like animals themselves, these silly animal jokes will keep your kids seriously entertained! What do young horses wrap their food in. As an Amazon Associate we earn from qualifying purchases. I was nervous at first, but she promised me it wasn't a colt. . Why did the horses check bounce? 36.) 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